1
Steal everything you can from Whole Foods.
2
When the guest lecturer tells you he has a
secret, then leans in and bites your ear, keep
your eyes open. Pretend to be asleep.
3
Call your mother. Watch the room fill with
water as she speaks. This is GOOD MATERIAL.
4
Cosplay shadows in the corner of the
bookstore. Buy nothing (you have no
money). When you’re bored of reading,
smell the pages of books the size of cereal
boxes and imagine the outfits you’d wear if
you’d picked a different life.
5
Spend weeknights going on bad dates.
Order martinis. Laugh, wink, become the
ingenue you aren’t. This is GOOD MATERIAL.
Lie about your life. Assure yourself This is
what love feels like.
6
When a gingko leaf falls on your head, that’s
a message from god. (You’re omniscient!)
(You’re a prophet!) Spend the afternoon
drafting a guestlist for hell.
7
Picture an ancient bird-like white woman
who follows you all the time. She is your
audience. If you displease her, you die.
8
When the gay man at the Title IX office
hands you a tissue after reporting that your
case is, without physical evidence of
violence, merely hearsay, say thank you.
9
If you run low on friends, take up the
practice of talking to ghosts. Try to make
yourself quirky. This is GOOD MATERIAL.
10
Be disciplined. Merely live to work. Before
bed, say a prayer. Upon waking, say The End.
DAVID EHMCKE lives in New York. His recent work has appeared or is forthcoming in The Drift, The Missouri Review, swamp pink, Image, EPOCH, The Adroit Journal, bodega, and like a field.
ROGER CAMP is the author of three photography books, including the award-winning Butterflies in Flight, Thames & Hudson, 2002. His documentary photography has been awarded the prestigious Leica Medal of Excellence and published in The New England Review, New York Quarterly, and Orion Magazine. He is represented by the Robin Rice Gallery, New York.
